Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Dragon Inn

Curtis and I watched Dragon Inn last night. Here are some lessons this film teaches you:

1. Eunichs look like regular men except for excessive amount of blush.
2. Eunichs have magical powers of telekinesis along with amazing swordplay skills.
3. Beware of barbarian butchers. They can remove the flesh from your hand and foot without you noticing until too late.
4. "Spicy meat" is a euphemism for human meat.
5. There is a proverb for every situation, especially if it is irrelevant. "The eagle's talons do not marvel at the beauty of a rose" is a meaningful answer to a question such as "What did you have for dinner last night?"


(I made that proverb up. Try to unravel some philosophical meaning from that one! Booyah!)
(...)
(Ooh, I just did. I think I'm going to start using that phrase now in everyday situations such as this:
Some German Guy: "Mein Gott! Your minion just destroyed that priceless painting! Does he have no respect for the arts?!"
Me: " 'The eagle's talons do not marvel at the beauty of a rose.' "
S.G.G.: "...Die Hölle? What does that mean?"
Me: "He is an assassin under my employ. He has not the heart and soul to admire such things."
S.G.G.: "That makes you the eagle, ya?"
Me: " 'Falling autumn leaves do not make good fish.' "
S.G.G.: *immense confusion*
Me: *immense pride in the inscrutability of my metaphors*)

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